DISCLAIMER: The characters and situations of the television program "Lonesome Dove: The Outlaw Years" are the creations of Rysher Television, and have been used without permission. Steve and Terry Irwin are owners and creations of themselves. "Crocodile Hunter" airs on ANIMAL PLANET. No copyright infringement is intended. This story is not to be published on any ftp site, newsgroup, mailing list, fanzine or elsewhere without the express permission of the author.
I love LONESOME DOVE. I love THE CROCODILE HUNTER. Both shows tell the tale of two hunters - one has the nature of the beast, one is half-mad. But ... which is which?
Call's pale blue eyes narrowed suspiciously as the man in khaki shorts cautiously edged near his bench. This blond foreigner was dangerously nearing into Call's territory. Everyone in Curtis Wells knew that that bench was his, and by damn, no man was going to take it from him. Call's seemingly relaxed posture tightened, ready to spring into action if the man should come nearer.
"Whew," the Crocodile Hunter commented excitedly to the camera as he stealthily approached the dangerous animal on the bench. "This is one the endangered bounty hunter species in North America. This one's a male. He looks like he's about 25 years old. Healthy condition."
The Crocodile Hunter slowed temporarily, warily gauging the creature on the bench.
"I've got to approach this one very carefully. He knows I'm coming. Look at his posture. WHEW! Ready to strike like a snake, but with the power of the bear. No one - no one," he repeated, " should try this if you see one of these in the wild."
Then, as usual, the hunter began the approach.
He continued in his Australian accent, "Look at him! Isn't he gorgeous?!? Look at his coat. Beautiful embroidery. WHEW! Absolutely gorgeous!!!"
The blond foreign man was too near for Call's comfort. Call, in opportune form, jumped up from his slothiness and tried to tackle the man. The blond foreigner, despite his seemingly lack of grace, dodged Call, and jumped him from behind, wrangling him the ground.
The blond foreigner held his arms from behind and somehow managed to hold Call's jaw. Perhaps the blond man thought Call was going to bite him.
No one hardly ever got the jump on Call. Call knew that this was hunter worth his merit.
"Whew!" The Crocodile Hunter let out an excited yelp as he held the struggling creature in his grasp. "What a naughty boy! Did you see the way he tried to attack me? Prime reflexes. It took all my strength to wrestle him down."
The Crocodile Hunter got a better grip on the creature.
"These animals are susceptible to hits on the head. It looks like this one has had several. You can see the many bumps on his cranium."
The Crocodile Hunter continued to struggle with the creature.
"This one doesn't like to be held. It's alright, boy," he cooed reassuringly to the animal.
"I'm gonna let him go now and let him go back to his home. He's an absolutely gorgeous animal and you can see why these animals need to be protected and nurtured."
The blond foreigner suddenly let Call go and jumped away from him.
Call sprung from off the ground. He eyed the blond foreigner warily, and decidedly the man really meant no harm.
Call made the "safe" sign with his hands and shrugged. He sat back down on his bench. Call did not even brush himself off.
The blond foreigner raised his fist in triumph and exclaimed, "Woo-hoo!" He survived the encounter with the dangerous bounty hunter species of North America.
"I know that Steve was excited to actually witness the rare North American breed of the bounty hunter species," Terri Irwin, the Crocodile Hunter's wife, said in the voice over. "They are truly a rare and beautiful species. We hope that through efforts by wildlife conservatories and lovers everywhere that this species will thrive again."
END 1/01
Darcie Daniels
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